They’re all coming out of the woodwork!

In the last month, 3 guys who I thought I’d said goodbye to have contacted me.

Is it the time of year when these guys want to “try it again” and see if things will work out this time? Are they lonely? What’s up?

Some of the contact has been welcomed, such as the casual fun with Mr. Done. Others, not so much.

Like The Short Man who’s IMing me right now to tell me how much he misses me and wishes things could’ve worked out. Trying to tug at the old guilt-strings, I guess. “Even tho things did not work out between us I’m glad you gave me a chance you will always be a special memory for me. At least we tried to make it work, I will always think of you as very beautiful and very sweet.” (his spelling and sentence structure). We went out for 2 weeks, and I think I knew after a few dates that it just wasn’t going to work for me. One reason, I’ll admit, is because he’s my same height, and I’m only 5′4″. Call me vain, call me superficial, call me whatever you’d like, but I want the guy I’m dating to be taller than me, since that’s not too hard to find. I want to be able to wear any size heels I want and not worry about it. But, seriously, if we would’ve been more well-suited for each other, I don’t think his height would’ve bothered me one bit. He was just too clingy, too needy. Plus the fact that he didn’t really have a job. He “worked for his dad,” who is a successful commercial real estate agent in San Francisco. Although Mr. Short Man be done with work at 1pm on a week day. Something just doesn’t add up.

Then there’s my Italian Crush. Now things with Italian Crush seemed to have some potential. He is a very good looking, down to earth guy who is 100% Italian, just like me, so we understood our upbringing and ways of relating to family, food, etc. Sure he had some interests that I didn’t share, like guns. He was really into owning and maintaining guns. I’ve always felt that guns only belong in the hands of police officers and military personnel, but that’s just me. I’d never own a gun, nor would I necessarily want to have one in my home. But, hey, everyone’s different, so if Italian Crush liked guns, so be it. He and I related to each other very well, and we seemed to have a mutual attraction. He took me to a Halloween party that his cousins were giving, and I had a great time. Everything seemed to be going well in the month or so we dated, until he told me that I’d be a perfect girlfriend once I lost weight. WTF? How do you say that to someone? I told him that was so superficial; it would be like me telling him that he’s great and perfect for me, except that he doesn’t make enough money. Anyway, he recently called to invite me to go shooting with him at a local shooting range. I told him that I couldn’t make it because of my schedule. Although, it is something that might be fun to try once in life. Then he invited me to come to his house for a bbq. He and his cousin just bought a house, and he really wants me to see it. “I’ll even make you dinner. And you can relax in our hot tub.” Oh, ya, right, I’m going to get in a hot tub with you after you told me you think I’m too fat to be your girlfriend? I think not. I told him that I wasn’t really sure, and he said, “well, c’mon, we can hang out even if we’re not dating, right? I like you and really want you in my life.” Ugh. Not sure exactly what to do about this one. For the moment I pushed his invitation off into “rain check status,” so we’ll see if he calls again to connect.

So, I ask, what is going on? Why are all of these faces from the past coming back? I don’t want to go backwards or repeat patterns — I’m looking forward, moving ahead. It just makes me wonder who else is lurking in the shadows, about to reveal themselves to me.