It’s almost here!

The day I’ve been thinking about for the last 2 years is almost here. All the money, all the papers, all the iMovies, all the surveys, all the planning, all the meetings, all the fieldwork, all the missed social engagements, all the reading, all the all-nighters.. have all been for this one day.

TOMORROW I GRADUATE WITH MY MASTERS DEGREE IN EDUCATIONAL LEADERSHIP!!!!!!!!!!!

I can’t believe it! I’m so excited that I wonder if I’ll sleep tonight. Of course, I have to, because I still have a full day of teaching ahead of me tomorrow, but still… how awesome is it that tomorrow night at this time I’ll have a masters degree?!!

In some ways it doesn’t seem real. I guess this must be sort of what it’s like the night before a wedding. All the preparation and planning comes down to one day that you’ve been anticipating for so long.

I never remember being this excited when I was about to graduate with my undergrad degree. I guess because this has been so much more challenging, and so much more rewarding, all at the same time.

Whatever will I do on Monday nights from 4:30 to 8:30? (I’m sure I can come up with something!!)

Surprise, Surprise!

For the last month or so, CTLB’s mother and I have been exchanging emails.  She wanted to come out to CA from Connecticut to surprise CTLB for our upcoming graduation on Monday.  She suggested that I ask CTLB out for a celebratory drink, and she’d be able to walk into whichever bar we were at and surprise her daughter.

This is all easier said than done.  First of all, CTLB and I work 1 hour from her home in SF.  She and her fiance have 1 car, so she usually leaves around 3:30 or 4pm to go pick him up each afternoon.  There isn’t a lot of room for spontaneous suggestions of happy hour drinks.  Plus, how was I going to pick a place close enough to the airport for CTLB’s mom to arrive in a cab, yet not throw any suspicion about why we would be getting a drink so far off the beaten path?

I finally had to clue CBCB in on the surprise, to ask her for some suggestions.  She graciously offered to pick CTLB’s mom up from the airport and bring her to a pub that was closer to school, where we all often hang out.  Whew!  Problem solved.

Now all I had to do was make it through these last few weeks without somehow slipping up and mentioning the visit, offhandedly.  I was crossing my fingers that our devious plan would work and that CTLB would in fact be surprised by the visit.

Today she and I went to the pub and ordered drinks (yes, I broke the fast, but this was a very good reason, don’t you think?).  The entire time we were chit-chatting my heart was beating a mile a minute in anticipation of CTLB’s mom showing up to surprise her.

Then I saw her, coming down the street (we were sitting at a table on the outside patio, with CTLB strategically seated with her back to the entrance.  Pretty good planning, no?).  CTLB’s mom walked up next to her and said, “can I join you guys for a drink?!!”  The look on CTLB’s face was something like this:

It was a mixture of shock, confusion, joy, and WTF is going on around here?!!

The plan worked perfectly, CTLB was surprised, and her mom is going to have ball with her all weekend. I was so relieved that everything worked out and that the two of them were so happy.

Being sneaky for a good cause was really fun!  Maybe I have a future as an undercover agent?

Encourage the Heart

On Monday night, my grad school class met at a local Mexican cantina to celebrate our upcoming graduation. Before everyone (but me) ate, the professors wanted to make a few speeches and offer a few “awards.”

Lots of these awards were sort of funny, like the “Rush Limbaugh Award” for the guy in class who always speaks his mind, even when the rest of us are rolling our eyes and wishing he’d just be quiet. And another award for the school team who has had to go through 3 principals in 2 years.

Then the professor said, “and this next award is the Kouzes/Posner Encourage the Heart Award for the _________ Team.” That’s us! CTLB and me!! This award is such an honor because the it refers to the book Leadership Challenge by James Kouzes and Barry Posner. It’s an amazing book, and anyone who is interested in leadership on any level should definitely read it.

The Encourage the Heart chapter talks about:

Exemplary leaders understand this need to Recognize Contributions and are constantly engaged in these essentials:

• Focus on clear standards
• Expect the best
• Pay attention
• Personalize recognition

By putting these four essentials into practice and recognizing contributions, leaders stimulate and motivate the internal drive within each individual.

How cool is that? I was so touched to be recognized this way in front of my peers. CTLB and I were both so excited by this. What a nice way to end this grueling semester!

A little sprucing up before the party

CTLB and I are having a graduation party at my house on May 16th to celebrate receiving our Masters degrees. I love having parties, but because I invited so many people, and most of them said yes, I decided it was time to spruce the place up a bit before everyone came over. You see, lots of the people that I’ve invited have never been to my house before, and I want them to have the best impression possible of it, because I’m always saying how much I love it here.

Today my dad and I spent 3 1/2 hours picking out and planting some flowers and plants for around the house.

We made some “colorpots” for the outside porch area. Just some plastic bowls that look like terracotta filled with impatiens, since it’s really shady in the front. (pics to come, but since it’s dark outside now, I can’t get a good picture of them).

I have a great flower box outside my front window, but the problem is that the three huge trees in the front of my house offer so much shade that nothing grows in them. Plus, I don’t think there is any sort of drainage, so the flowers and plants we planted last year didn’t do very well. I decided to “cheat” this year by buying some potted verbenas that I have in the sun in the backyard for now and I will place in the window box right before the party. Clever, no? (ditto pics).

Then I bought 2 kangaroo paw ferns and a spider plant that are hanging outside the back porch area. I like how they add warmth to the look of the back of the house, although I’m not thrilled with the white, plastic pots they’re in. But I didn’t want to spend a ton of money on containers for the back of the house, you know? (ditto pics)

I also bought two beautiful ivys to put inside my breakfast nook in this great ceramic, Mexican-inspired bowl that has beautiful yellow sunflowers painted on it. Again, the addition of the ivys makes the little room look so much more comfy and homey.

Close-up of the bowl.

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My mom knows that I have wanted to change my living room around since we hung these pictures up when I first moved in. I had this Diego Rivera print hanging up: I love this picture, but it was the very first thing I bought for my first apartment when I was 24. That was eh-hem, 12 years ago, and I’m just a bit tired of it. So instead, my mom gave me this gorgeous, black wrought-iron piece that she’s had in her living room for years. (She recently bought something else where this was hanging, and wanted it to be put to good use). I have always loved this wrought-iron piece, and was thrilled that she agreed to give it to me. I think the effect is gorgeous:

It’s so much fun to make a few little changes and have a whole new feel around the house!

I can almost hear the angels singing…

I was joking with CTLB the other day and told her that after finishing our professional development plan and the last paper for class the other night, I expected angels to sing and the sun’s rays to break through the clouds. I was sort of disappointed with not feeling more relieved.

Now I know that some of this came because we still had a few things to do:

1. Get our action research project bound at Kinko’s
2. Create a powerpoint for our final exhibition presentation
3. Graduate!

Today we got one step closer to the singing angels, because we finished our powerpoint! And it only took us 4 1/2 hours. Considering it’s a 20 minute presentation full of information, this wasn’t bad at all. Especially since both CTLB and I are perfectionists. She’s the layout lady and I’m the copy queen.

I better get my sunglasses out, because I think those rays of sun are about to hit, and I can hear the angels warming up their vocal cords as I write this.

CTLB, this picture is for you!!!

Things are looking up

I got paid today, and things are feeling a bit calmer around my head.

This last week or so I’ve been really stressed out about not having any money.  I hate that feeling, and since I haven’t felt it in quite a while, it was on the forefront of my mind.

Doesn’t it suck that money has such an influence on our lives?  Not having it, I mean.

This month is going to be another tough one, but hopefully not as bad as the last one.  Plus, good old George W. is going to help all of us out of our recession by giving us $600.  Ya, cuz that’s going to go a long way.  Maybe it’ll buy me a few tankfuls of $4/gallon gas?  Not that I’m complaining.  $600 will come in very handy this month.

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On a side note, I’ve got about a week and half before I graduate!  On Monday I turned in a huge professional development plan all about how to increase equity for our Black and Brown students at school, and I’m very proud of it.  The other members of my grad program who are in my school district and I worked on it, and it’s very comprehensive and impressive, if I do say so myself.  I also wrote the final paper for class and turned that in on Monday, as well.

Only three things left:

1. Get my action research project/thesis bound and ready for submission to the university
2. Create and present a final exhibition presentation (powerpoint) on my action research project and the essential learnings of the past 2 years
3. Go through a fieldwork presentation/interview about all of this with my fieldwork supervisor and my principal

Luckily I don’t have to do 1 & 2 by myself, CTLB and I will be completing those tasks together.  The interview is on my own, but I’m such a good talker that I’m sure it’ll be a piece of cake.

I can’t believe that this is all almost over!  It’s been a long haul, but it’s been wonderful, too.  I wouldn’t change a minute of it, and I’ll be forever grateful to have shared this experience with CTLB.

I almost don’t want to think about it ending, because that means that the date of her departure back home is drawing nearer.  I’ve been living in a state of denial for at least 6 months about her moving away.  She has become one of my best friends, and I feel so close to her.  I don’t want to imagine what life is going to be life without being able to see her everyday.  But, I’m so excited for her to be back with her family and for her to start her new life as a married lady closer to all of her friends and family.  I’m sure I’ll have a long and tearful post about all of this later.

For now, I want to focus on the positive and all of the great things that are about to happen.

Put it out there and it will come

No, this isn’t some weird Field of Dreams reference, it’s actually an allusion to The Secret.

I have actually read or watched The Secret, but I’ve heard enough about it to know that one of the main concepts is that you have to put out there in the universe those things that you want and need. If you do this with your whole heart in a positive manner, it will come to you, eventually.

I haven’t really tried this philosophy too much, until recently.

This month has been a bit tough for me financially. I’ve had to put out $900 for the fasting program — start up costs, monthly lab and doctor’s fees, and the food. I also spent quite a bit of money in Napa for CTLB’s bachelorette party weekend. (I won’t mention exactly how much, because CTLB reads this blog frequently, and that would be pretty crass). It was well worth it, but the timing of spending this money was a bit difficult this month.

With all my normal bills and expenses ($2100), this month was going to be bad. Considering that I’m a teacher and don’t make a lot of money, I knew I was going to be in the hole, and had no idea how I was going to make it until the end of the month. I was getting pretty stressed out, but I’m so proud and hate asking people to borrow money.

I finally broke down and asked BFF if I could borrow $100. She said that she would love to let me borrow the money, but she just didn’t have it. I was so worried about what I was going to do, and almost called my parents to ask for the money. I was hesitant to ask them, because I knew I’d hear about it: “you’re 36 years old, why don’t you know how to manage your money better?”

A couple of hours after my first call, BFF called me back and told me she could loan me the money. I asked her if she was sure, because I didn’t want the loan to put her in a hard spot for the month, but she said that she could do it. As a thank you, I gave her a gift card to Macy’s that I had gotten from one of my students for Christmas. I thought of it as “interest.” She tried to refuse it, but I insisted.

Whew! A bit of breathing room. I’ve been really budgeting my money for most of the month, and trying to make the gasoline last as long as possible, but with prices at almost $4/gallon, you can only go so far, you know?

I don’t get paid until Thursday, and I was wondering how I was going to make it until payday. I’d already almost spent all $100, and had to drive quite a bit in the upcoming week.

So, I decided to take a chance and ask the management company that handles my duplex if there was any sort of referral fee for finding someone to move into the duplex next door. (I’ll write more about my new neighbor in another post). They wrote back and said that they didn’t have any sort of official policy, but that they thought it was a reasonable request, and they’d be mailing me $100 by the end of the month!

What great news! They could’ve just said that I could pay $100 less on my rent next month, but that wouldn’t have been very helpful to my current situation this week. I was so relieved that they were going to mail me a check. I’ve been on pins and needles all week wondering when it was going to come, and it finally arrived today!

I’m not sure if all of these are little coincidences or not, but I think the money was able to come to me this month, when I needed it the most, because I really put it out there in the universe that I needed help. Oh, and by the way, I don’t plan on having anything like this happen again. I hate living above my means, and this month was a good reminder of what can happen when you overextend yourself.

Saul Williams is a poet & prophet

This week I started a poetry unit in my classes. Some students can’t get into poetry, so I always assign a poetry slam day, where they can bring in poems that they write or that others have written and perform them. I also showed them a DVD of one of my favorite poets of modern times, Saul Williams, in order to inspire them.

Did it ever! One of my students (who sleeps through every class) woke up, watched the DVD, and even came up to me after class and asked me to give him Saul Williams’ name so that he could look him up. That’s powerful!!

Saul Williams is a man on another level. He is before his time and before our time. He is a poet for the masses and a prophet for all. I’m sure “they” won’t know the gravity of his genius until he is gone.

The first clip, Ohm, is one of my favorite pieces that Saul has done, and the one that I played today in class. The second and third are newer pieces that I found today, but just as brilliant as his older work.

Enjoy:

Saul Willliams - Ohm

Saul Williams - Coded Language

Saul Williams - Not In Our Name (The Pledge of Resistance)

I see the light at the end of the tunnel!

When people have had a near-death experience, many of them talk about seeing a light at the end of a long, dark tunnel. No, I’m not near death, but after this weekend’s frenzy of getting my grad school portfolio together, I may be close.

I have gone through my entire program keeping careful track of all of my assignments, reflections, and the major aspects of my action research project. Everything is subdivided into organized folders on my computer. Organizing and collating this portfolio should’ve been a breeze, right? Not so much, unfortunately.

You see, for as neat and organized as I am with the electronic files on my computer, I am a mess at keeping all of the hard copies of my evidence, essays, reflections, and student samples in some sort of order. To be honest, I knew I had everything, the problem was: where? Looking back, I wish I had just dumped everything into a box in my room that I could sort through quickly. If only I had thought ahead.

As it was, I had papers in all sorts of places — in my binders, in my school bags, in my desk at school, and even in a box in the basement of my house. Ugh. Every time I looked for something that I needed I almost gave up hope, but then, miraculously, it would turn up.

Yesterday I spent a majority of the day organizing, compiling, collating, and writing. I worked from 11am-2pm. Then I went to CBCB’s house for a couple of hours to see her vacation photos from Greece (lucky bum). I came home and worked some more, but finally hit a wall at 6pm and decided to veg out in front of the t.v. for a little while. I think I fell asleep somewhere around 8:30pm and didn’t wake up until 10:30pm, when the phone rang. One of my grad school buddies was calling to check on how something was supposed to be organized. Good thing! The call was exactly what I needed to get my second wind. I worked from 11pm-5am. Yes, 5 am in the morning! Into the wee hours of the night. I finally went to sleep this morning at 5am and woke up at 10am. Then it was back to work, from 11-noon. A quick stop to my parents’ house to pick up a hole punch turned into two hours of me driving all the way to school to get my more industrial strength hole punch from my classroom. I got back home at 2:30 and was raring to go. I was printing fiend…until I ran out of paper.

HOW COULD I RUN OUT OF PAPER AT A TIME LIKE THIS? Didn’t I get that ream of paper I had at school? Where is it, it’s got to be here somewhere. Nope, I left it at school. Aaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!

Stressed out and panicked, I called BFF to see if she had any paper I could borrow. She had just returned from a women’s wellness weekend, and was as relaxed and calm as I was stressed and out of my mind. I was talking a mile a minute, and she was answering back in a slow, lilting voice. Talking to her actually showed me how tightly wound I was all weekend.

Paper in hand, I started back to work. Printing, stapling, and hole-punching. Getting everything in just the right spot in the binder.

And finally, I had done everything except finish my leadership growth essay. Nothing more to focus on as a way of procrastination. The majority of the paper had been written in February, so all I really had to do was edit a few things, add in some evidence, and write the conclusion. Which I did. I wrote a metaphor about a path, a journey, and how no one wants to follow a leader who doesn’t know where she’s going. It is actually very good, although after reading it, I wasn’t completely satisfied. I think that at this point I am way too close to it, not to mention a bit sleep deprived. I’ll look at it again later tonight and see I can perfect it any further.

But that’s not the point. The point is that I can see a small light at the end of the tunnel. May 12 is nearing closer, and soon I will be DONE. For now I’m done (lower case, since there’s still another paper to turn in next week), and I couldn’t be happier. It wasn’t easy, but this huge portion of my grad school coursework is now totally and completely and wonderfully done!!!!

I got the job!

In all my excitement in writing about my Napa weekend, I forgot to mention that I got the fellowship for the summer that I was hoping for.

I start the first Monday after school gets out, and I’m looking forward to it. I can’t think of a better way (or a better place) to work during summer. Not that I really want to work over summer vacation, but since I haven’t hit the lotto yet…

I think I’m going to learn quite a few new things by working there, and hopefully, I’ll lend them a bit of my expertise and knowledge. The job is going to be interesting and the people are going to be really fun, so I can’t really ask for more than that.

Girls’ Weekend in Napa - the conclusion

Note: Before you read this post, make sure you’ve read the background

When I had the idea for spending a weekend in Napa to celebrate CTLB’s bachelorette party, I couldn’t have imagined having a better time than we did this weekend.

The entire weekend was perfect, from the weather, to the wine, to the food, to the male attention, to the spa. Each of us got along so well, and there was none of that competitiveness or drama that sometimes accompanies girls’ weekends. No one felt out of place or awkward, even when we had to get naked in a tubs of mud together.

The most amazing thing was that I know have 3 new women that I can truly call my friends. I was able to get to know each of them so much better, and we were able to forge connections that I know will last. You don’t often find amazing friendships out of a bachelorette party, yet I did.

CTLB was so happy, and that was really the whole point. I’m so glad we were able to make these memories together, and we can all look back on this weekend as one of the best times of our lives.

It just doesn’t get any better than that.

Girls’ Weekend in Napa - the spa

Note: Before you read this post, make sure you’ve read the background

One of the great things about the package that we got at the Golden Haven Hot Springs Spa and Resort was the spa package. Included with our 2-room suite was a spa day:

• Mud bath
• Mineral Jacuzzi
• Warm towel body wrap
• 1/2 hour massage, 1/2 hour facial OR a 1 hour spa OR a 1 hour facial

The Mud Bath

Never having a mud bath before, I wasn’t sure exactly what to expect. I knew I’d have to get naked in front of my friends, and not being too happy with the way my body looks, I wasn’t thrilled about this. At the same time, I am comfortable with who I am an how I look, realize that my body is a work in progress, and know that none of these girls were going to judge me. They all knew the struggle I was going through with weight loss, and were all really supportive of my journey.

CTLB, Gatsby, and I were led into our mud bath room by our “mud technician,” Tony. This kid couldn’t have been out of high school, yet here he was, about to see us in the mud baths. Kind of a great job for a teenage boy, I would think.

When we first walked into the room, the most noticeable thing was the smell of the mud baths. The hot springs at the spa contain sulfur, and if you’ve smelled sulfur before, you know it smells like rotten eggs. Not quite a scent that screams “aromatherapy” to me. Then Tony mentioned that as we were getting into the tubs of mud, we should be careful to avoid the sides and the bottom of the tub, because they had heating coils that could burn our skin. He said to be sure never to stand up in the tub, otherwise we’d burn our skin. Great.

Easing into this tub of bubbling mud, naked and afraid of getting burned, I thought we’d made a huge mistake signing up for these mud baths. The mud was scalding hot and the stench was overpowering. The cool thing about the mud was that you really did float at the top of the tub, never getting close enough to the bottom to come close to touching the burning coils. We quickly put mud on ourselves to cover up enough for Tony to come back in.

He applied a clay mask to each of our faces and put a cool washcloth soaked in eucalyptus on each of our foreheads. The washcloth really made the experience, because not only did it help keep your body cool, but the scent of the eucalyptus was strong enough to mask the awful sulfur smell.

After about 10 minutes, Tony came in and told us it was time to get out and shower off. Ok, so now I have to somehow hoist myself out of this tub of bubbling mud, making sure not to touch the sides or the bottom and not worrying about how my fat, naked body looks. Sure, no problem! Right! I got myself onto the top of the tub, but couldn’t quite hoist myself to the floor. I had to ask CTLB to pull me out, which she did. As I came out of the tub with mud dripping all over my body, I can only imagine that I resembled a statue of some ancient civilization’s fertility goddess.

Next came the group shower, with all three of us helping each other remove the mud from every crack and crevice on our bodies. Even with the hose attachment on the shower, I still think the mud is going to be around for days to come. CTLB even said that she thought she’d hold off on having sex for a few days, just to make sure nothing got lodged up there.

Mineral Jacuzzi

This was nice and relaxing, as any session in a jacuzzi normally is. We were able to chat and re-hydrate by drinking plenty of lemon water.

Hot Blanket Body Wrap

Next Tony led us to a room with three massage tables. We got on the tables between the sheets, and then he came back in and wrapped us in these huge, heated blankets. It was a lot like being tucked into bed as a kid. Something very soothing and satisfying about it. Tony turned down the lights, and we were able to relax for about 20 minutes. It was so wonderful to be able to lay there and let the thoughts spill out.

The Treatment - Facial

I opted for an hour-long facial, because I love the way they leave my face feeling. Rebecca, my aesthetician, was about as granola as they come, but she was also incredibly kind and sweet. She explained that she’d be using all-natural products on me. The exfoliator would be made from cornmeal, the main mask was clay, and then she would apply a whipped cream & honey mixture to cool my skin down afterwards. She asked me if I’d like to have a foot and neck massage, and I told her I’d love to. I knew I was in for the ultimate hour of pampering.

The only snag in this whole scenario was when she applied the warm towels to my face to open my pores. For some reason, as she put the towels over my face, mouth, and eyes, I panicked. I felt like I couldn’t breath, and had to ask her to make sure that the towels weren’t over my eyes, nose, or mouth. I apologized for my reaction, but she said not to worry, that lots of people feel as if they’re suffocating when towels are placed on their faces like that. She said she thought it had something to do with things that happen to us as we’re born, during childbirth. Like I said, she was a granola momma of the 60s.

I emerged from the facial feeling refreshed and renewed. The skin on my face and entire body felt so soft and light. After going through the mud bath, shower, and mineral jacuzzi with CTLB and Gatsby, I can definitely say that we’re all much closer friends! I guess being naked in mud and then showering off together has that effect, huh?

Napa Girls’ Weekend - Pin the “macho” on the man

Note: Before you read this post, make sure you’ve read the background

What bachelorette party is complete without some fun, racy games?

AB found the perfect game - Pin the “Macho” on the Man. Just as the name sounds, it’s a big-girl version of Pin the Tail on the Donkey. This game came complete with 25 different “machos” (penises) to pin on the beefcake guy on the poster. Each girl chooses her favorite “macho” from a wide variety of types, sizes, and levels of erectness. Then she closes her eyes, gets spun around, and tries to pin the macho on the man.

Given the fact that most of us were fairly drunk at this point in the evening, it didn’t take much spinning for us to have a great time. Poor PE got spun so much by CTLB that she ended up falling into the wall. She was ok, thankfully, but I’m not too sure our next door neighbors really appreciated the huge bang in the middle of the night.

This game was truly hilarious, and capped off our evening of debauchery perfectly.

Girls’ Weekend in Napa - Susie’s Bar

Note: Before you read this post, make sure you’ve read the background

As we were walking from the restaurant, we noticed a bar with a tiny doorway and a Bud Light neon sign. It looked like a fun, dive bar that we could get into some trouble in. And, boy, were we right!!

We walked into the bar and were met with hoots and hollers. Yes, we were a group of 5 good looking girls, but I’ve never walked into a bar with that kind of reaction. AB said she thought a game was on t.v. and they were cheering a good play. There were a few people in the bar; most of them looked like a motley crew of local men. I had a feeling that the cast of characters in this place was going to make for excellent fodder for this blog.

Looking around the bar, there were tons of Bud Light neon signs, a jukebox, a stripper pole, and an erotic photo hunt game. All the ingredients for quite a night, as you can imagine.

We walked up to the bar, and I’m sure the bartender was thinking, “I don’t want to make a bunch of fru-fru cosmo drinks for these bitches.” Instead, we ordered 5 shots of Jameson and 5 beers. Definitely unexpected, I’m sure. We took our first shots and found a table in the middle of the bar.

Soon enough, the boys in the bar started showing off and hitting each other in the chest. Kinda weird, but whatever. Soon enough, one of the guys (Roman) sat down at our table. He didn’t say anything at first, just sat there and kinda stared at us and told us to continue our conversation. Then another one of the guys (Ricardo) came up and started chatting us up. It turns out that all of these guys were from Calistoga, and most of them were somehow involved with all of the local wineries.

I have to say, I have not gotten this much male attention in a L-O-N-G time. Usually when I go out to a bar with friends, I’m the girl the guys talk to in a friendly way, but I’m not the one they flirt with. (At my weight, I expect this, right or wrong. The people you’re meeting at bars aren’t usually looking for deep, intriguing conversation. They’re looking for a good time, and more often than not, they’re idea of a good looking girl isn’t someone with more than 100 pounds to lose. Yes, it’s sad, but we live in a superficial society, and I’m as guilty of going for looks over substance when I am initially attracted to a guy at a bar). But not this time!

This time, my friends were the girls these guys were talking to in a friendly way, but I was the one getting all the flirty looks and conversation. Roman seemed to like me so much that he bought the whole group of us a couple of rounds of drinks. What an ego lift! Even though these guys weren’t going to be future boyfriends, to be sure, it was so much fun to have these guys flirting and vying for my attention. Every time I went outside to smoke, some new guy was coming up to me and talking. I definitely felt like the belle of the ball. And I was definitely coming back to Calistoga!

Outside, smoking a cigarette with Gatsby, all of a sudden I look up and see two girls coming into the bar wearing bad miniskirts on roller skates. Can you say Boogie Nights? Not only that, but they had a HUGE dog with them. Think mastif or some big breed like that. One girl even had “Adios” written on the back of her skirt. We got a great picture of it that I’ll post as soon as I can.

Next up was a girl from Virginia who came outside saying, “O.M.G., I can’t believe I can’t bring my beer outside to smoke!” She literally said the letters OMG. Priceless. Back in the bar and suddenly Virginia girl was up on the stripper pole showing her stuff to the locals. We sat there watching her like you watch a train wreck, not wanting to look, but unable to look away. We even got to know that she was wearing pink panties. Pretty soon she was climbing the pole, but it turned out that she was a bit too tipsy and she ended up falling down the pole and landing hard on her ass. Talking about this later, all of the girls and I decided this was probably the best thing that could’ve happened to her, because the way she was going, something bad was going to happen to her. Falling so hard on her ass woke her up and she suddenly became aware of how embarrassed she should be. She quieted down soon after that.

Oh, and I can’t forget to mention this old guy who was acting as busboy. I’m not even sure if he worked at the bar or if he cleaned up in order to get free drinks. As he was clearing away a round of our beer bottles and shot glasses, AB poured the dregs of each shot glass into one, and offered it to him. He downed it quicker than you can blink.

Next up in this night of ridiculous hilarity was The Cane. This guy was old, too, and had a look of no good about him. Several people in the bar warned us to watch out for him, which can’t be good. If a group of rowdy locals is telling you to stay away from some guy, you know he has to be trouble. He started chatting up CTLB and the other girls, and at that point, I went outside for another smoke. No sooner had I returned to the bar when The Cane was falling on his ass. I’m not entirely sure what happened, but it was a combination of him drinking too much, making an ass of himself, and unsuccessfully trying to touch one of my friends. It seems mean to laugh at a guy with a cane who falls on his face, but this guy was a pig who deserved the laughter.

The night ended with Roman putting the moves on me. He said, “I don’t really have any place for us to go. Can’t we go back to your hotel?” I reminded him I was there with 4 other girls, and he had no response. This guy expects me to bring him back to my hotel to have sex? Get real! I was actually surprised at how little game this guy had. Strange, really, considering all the effort he put into the evening buying me drinks, playing songs on the jukebox, and flirting. Too bad for him he couldn’t get to the payoff.

After the hookup that never was, I headed back to the hotel for more “girl time.”

All in all, Susie’s Bar was one of the best times I’ve had in a long time. It was the perfect mix of dive bar, rowdy boys, creeps, and roller skating, pole dancing girls. You just can’t make this stuff up!

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So, you might be wondering why I was wine tasting, eating dinner, and drinking when I’m supposed to be on this medically supervised fast. I had made the decision months ago that because this weekend was so special, and because CTLB is only going to get married once, I would break the fast and eat real food and drink real wine this weekend. Plus, I figured it was early enough in the fast that it wouldn’t affect my weight loss too severely. I made good choices in what I ate, overall, and I worked out hard on Saturday night when I got home to try to work off some of the calories that I took in. We’ll see what the scale says on Tuesday, but no matter what happens, it was definitely worth it to enjoy this weekend.

Girls’ Weekend in Napa - the dinner

Note: Before you read this post, make sure you’ve read the background.

We knew that no Girls’ Weekend would be complete without a nice dinner at one of Napa Valley’s restaurants. We also knew that we wanted to go to a nice place, but didn’t want to spend $100 on dinner.

I called Golden Haven to get some suggestions for restaurants in the area. I mentioned to the receptionist that we were looking for a nice place for a bachelorette weekend, but didn’t want to spend a ton of money. First she suggested Pacifico’s which she said was a Mexican restaurant that featured a mariachi band on Friday nights. Perfect, sounds fun. Then she mentioned that they also have a taco bar. Um, a taco bar? Not quite what we were looking for. Maybe I shouldn’t have said we didn’t want to spend too much, because she obviously took me literally. I told her we were looking for something a bit more upscale, and then she mentioned the restaurant at the Calistoga Inn. She said they had outdoor dining, and that it was a nice place to eat. I went on the website, looked at the menu, and figured that it was the perfect choice. The reservations were quickly made.

The patio was beautiful, and both PE and CTLB said that if they didn’t know better, they would think we were somewhere on Cape Cod. The weather was gorgeous on Friday, so Friday evening was still mild and beautiful.

The food at the Calistoga Inn was good, but not great. I think I chose the best of what the menu had to offer - I got the spring risotto, which had asparagus, spring peas, and mushrooms. It was light and delicious.

The best part of the dining experience was the ambiance and the conversation we had at the table. At one point, AB started asking CTLB if she “swallowed.” Yes, you’re reading that correctly, we started talking about what our preferences were with bjs. Too funny, but it was a bachelorette dinner, so I guess we had to get a little bit of sex talk in, right? The funniest part was when AB turned to me and said, “oh, I can tell that you swallow. In fact, I think you’re a gulper!!” A gulper?! Really? I didn’t know whether to be insulted or flattered, so I took it as flattery. Seriously, it was funny and so cute. I know AB didn’t mean anything mean by saying it, and she was more concerned that she was unable to swallow, much her her bf’s disappointment. As I sat there engaging in this conversation, I realized what a fun, open group of women we were that we could sit at dinner and discuss this topic.

We talked about lots of other topics, although none were quite as provocative as the swallowing.

With a nice dinner in our tummies, we were ready to hit a bar and start partying.

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So, you might be wondering why I was wine tasting, eating dinner, and drinking when I’m supposed to be on this medically supervised fast.  I had made the decision months ago that because this weekend was so special, and because CTLB is only going to get married once, I would break the fast and eat real food and drink real wine this weekend.  Plus, I figured it was early enough in the fast that it wouldn’t affect my weight loss too severely.  I made good choices in what I ate, overall, and I worked out hard on Saturday night when I got home to try to work off some of the calories that I took in.  We’ll see what the scale says on Tuesday, but no matter what happens, it was definitely worth it to enjoy this weekend.